We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
