no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Randomize
