All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
