We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
