Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
