shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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