Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
