all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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