I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
