I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
