That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
