He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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