I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
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