why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
