"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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