yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
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