i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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