What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
