hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Randomize
