I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
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