Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
