Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
