Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize