Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize