My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
