i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
