i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize