we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
