Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
