You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Can you bring me the toilet please
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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