I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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