You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
