Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
There's even glitter on my cock...
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