absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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