i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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