The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize