She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
