How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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