i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
