so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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