I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
How external is "for external use only"?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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