bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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