i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
