HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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