so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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