Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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