I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
