you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
