at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
