we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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