im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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