i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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